How Hospitality Can be as Easy as Learning One Word

One of my hobbies used to be swing dancing. I joined a swing dance club in college and learned a lot of fun moves. After the lesson each week during club, we would all practice the moves by dancing together. I went every week and saw the same people. I got asked to dance by the same guys a lot. There was one guy in particular who I had danced with a few times before, but every week he wouldn’t know my name. After swing dance club one night, I was telling my friend how much it bothered me that this kid couldn’t remember my name after weeks of dancing with him. I specifically remember saying, “Every time he asks me again what my name is, it feels like he’s basically saying, ‘You’re not worth remembering.‘”

It has always bothered me when someone can’t remember my name. I get that some people are just bad at it. I allow grace for the first couple times when I need to repeat my name. But then there are some people who take it to the extreme. I remember meeting someone in college probably five or six times, and every single time he acted like we’d never met. “You’re not worth remembering” is all I heard when he asked me my name and said, “It’s nice to meet you” for the fifth time.

We all long to be known. We all long to be seen and to be heard. And we all desire to be worth remembering.

Whether that guy in college ever remembered my name or not doesn’t matter. It’s not a big deal if that guy at swing dance club knows who I am … because there’s Someone who does. Even when we don’t feel like anyone knows us or hears us or sees. Even when we feel like we aren’t worth remembering. Even when someone straight out tells us we aren’t. There’s Someone who does know us by name.

This is what the Lord says — He who created you, He who formed you: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine.” –Isaiah 43:1

Yes, God knows each and every one of us by name. He knows us. He sees us. He hears us. He remembers us. For goodness sake, He knows the number of hairs on our heads! How much easier for Him to remember just our names!

Are not five sparrows sold for two cents? Yet, not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear, you are more valuable than many sparrows. — Luke 12:6-7

Do you know the names of people around you? Do you know the names of all your co-workers? Even the janitor who cleans your bathroom? Do you know the names of your neighbors? Do you know the name of the person slicing your meat at the deli? Or the person who scoops your ice cream at your favorite shop? What about your mailman? Do you even know the names of those who sit near you at church?

Being more like Jesus — something we are called to do — requires learning names. If we long to be known, so do those around us. We can show them we see them and we remember them by learning their names.

At Allume, I met Mandy on my first day in South Carolina. She was a part of the Allume team, so she knew a lot of people and had lots to do to keep things running smoothly. One day, Mandy saw me in the hallway. “Hi Tiffany, are you having a good time?” I was shocked that Mandy remembered me. She knew me by name — little ole me who had never been to a conference before and didn’t know anyone. This quiet girl who didn’t expect to be remembered, especially by someone on the team of the whole 400+ attendee conference. Mandy said hello to me every time she saw me. And she used my name to greet me. And it meant a lot. I felt worth remembering. I felt seen and known.

And there’s a lot of people out there who need to feel seen and known. A lot of people right next to us who need to feel like they are worth remembering. So go learn their names. It’s one word. One word that can make a lot of difference.

Peace to you. The friends here send their greetings. Greet the friends there by name. — 3 John 1:15